El ego de las personas que siempre necesitan ser reconocidos

El ego de las personas que siempre necesitan ser reconocidos
El ego de las personas que siempre necesitan ser reconocidos

«El ego de las personas constantemente necesita ser reconocido por sus acciones y actividades.»

 «La sombra del aplauso»

—Oye, ¿te acuerdas de cuando éramos niños y queríamos que la maestra nos felicitara por cada dibujo que hacíamos? —preguntó Carlos, mientras jugueteaba con la taza de café entre sus manos.

Estaban sentados en un pequeño café del centro, el ruido de la calle entrando por la ventana entreabierta.

—Claro que me acuerdo —respondió Ana, sonriendo con nostalgia—. Parecía que si no nos decía «muy bien», el dibujo no valía nada. Era como si necesitáramos que alguien más le diera sentido a lo que hacíamos.

Carlos asintió, mirando hacia afuera, donde un grupo de adolescentes pasaba riendo, cargando mochilas llenas de libros y sueños.

—Es curioso —dijo—, pero no creo que eso cambie mucho con los años. Mira a la gente en sus trabajos, en sus relaciones, incluso en el gimnasio.

Todos buscan que alguien les diga «bien hecho», que les den una palmadita en la espalda. Como si no pudiéramos sentirnos bien con nosotros mismos sin que otro nos lo confirme.

Ana tomó un sorbo de su café, pensativa.

—Sí, pero ¿qué pasa cuando no llega ese reconocimiento? —preguntó—. ¿Te has fijado en cómo la gente se desmorona cuando no obtiene la aprobación que espera? Es como si todo su esfuerzo perdiera valor de repente.

—Exacto —dijo Carlos, inclinándose hacia adelante—. Es como si estuviéramos atados a la opinión de los demás. Y lo peor es que eso nos desvía.

En lugar de hacer las cosas porque realmente queremos hacerlas, terminamos actuando para impresionar a otros. ¿Te das cuenta? Nos volvemos esclavos de lo que piensen los demás.

Ana suspiró, recordando algo.

—Mi abuela siempre decía que la peor forma de herir a alguien era ignorarlo. Como si la indiferencia fuera un arma. Y creo que tiene razón. Cuando alguien espera que lo vean, que lo reconozcan, y no obtiene nada, es como si lo borraran de un plumazo.

—Pero ahí está el problema —interrumpió Carlos—. Si dependemos de que otros nos vean, nos validen, nos den su aprobación, nunca seremos libres. Siempre estaremos esperando algo que puede que nunca llegue. Y eso… eso nos consume.

Ana asintió, mirando su reflejo en la ventana.

—Entonces, ¿cuál es la salida? —preguntó, casi en un susurro.

Carlos sonrió, como si hubiera estado esperando esa pregunta.

—La salida es dejar de buscar afuera lo que solo podemos encontrar adentro —dijo—. Aprender a reconocernos a nosotros mismos.

A valorar lo que hacemos, no porque alguien más lo apruebe, sino porque para nosotros tiene sentido. Porque nos mueve, nos inspira, nos hace sentir vivos.

Ana lo miró, y por un momento, pareció que algo dentro de ella se iluminaba.

—Es difícil, ¿no? —dijo—. Desprenderse de esa necesidad de aprobación. Pero creo que tienes razón. Si no lo hacemos, nunca seremos realmente dueños de nuestras decisiones, de nuestros sueños.

—Exacto —dijo Carlos, levantando su taza como si fuera un brindis—. Porque al final, el único reconocimiento que realmente importa es el que viene de aquí —señaló su corazón—. El resto es solo ruido.

Ana sonrió, y por primera vez en mucho tiempo, sintió que algo dentro de ella se soltaba, como si hubiera estado cargando un peso que ya no necesitaba llevar.

Y en ese momento, supo que, aunque el camino no fuera fácil, valía la pena intentarlo. Porque al final, la única opinión que realmente importaba era la suya propia.




© copyrigth: Jose Luis Vaquero, para entrepaginas.es

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